I’ll admit that it’s ironic that I am titling this “I need you to stop caring” when in fact the keywords for this post are in fact “potential”, “mentality”, and “productivity”.
You may be thinking these two topics don’t really match and I am just going to confuse my SEO – I will be honest, I will probably confuse my SEO regardless. That thing confuses me so it’s a mutually confusing relationship.
I digress.
I really need you to stop caring and here’s why:
- You are preventing yourself from reaching your potential
- Who cares? No one cares.
- Caring is meant for relationship building – not as a road block
Let’s dive into these a little bit more and I’m hoping by the end of it the seed will have been planted.
You are preventing yourself from reaching your potential
This header is a full paragraph. It speaks for itself but in case it doesn’t let’s spell it out.
Many of us are stuck in the mentality that all eyes are on us all the time. Like we’re on the god damn Truman Show. A lot of us like to think we are main characters who everyone is observing and talking about afterward – you can see now why reality TV has such an appeal. We think we are living that type of ~celebrity~, but in fact we are not. In fact, few of us will never reach that type of “all eyes on me”status nor should we want to.
That in itself should be liberating.
But if it’s not then let’s say it clearly. By censoring your potential and arbitrarily caring about what people (who don’t even matter most of the time) think about you…you pigeon hole yourself into a box that you ultimately let define you.
People change, people grow. You may not be the same person you were last year or you may not be the same person you were when you decided to pursue a certain career path and that is ok. It’s okay to change and to pivot. What is not okay is not changing or pivoting because you are afraid what someone might say.
Who cares? No one cares.
Said one way, “who cares” can come across as flippant and passive, almost like a brush off. And honestly that’s not a bad thing. I wish more people were able to emulate this because there’s a sense of agency. What I want to really nail down here is the fact that NO ONE CARES – mostly in response when someone is limiting themselves for the people.
Read: Someone is limiting their potential for the off chance that someone comments or calls them out. How might this look in reality? Glad you asked.
A lot of people are worried about having an online presence – aside from valid privacy and security concerns, people are concerned with what their friends and family will say if they come across their content. And oddly enough there is some concern about what stranger is going to troll them.
First of all, let the stranger troll you – it’s good for the algorithm.
Second of all, I guarantee your friends and family do not care. If they do care, hopefully they are supportive in you trying something new. If they aren’t supportive then honestly, make them actually tell you that your face.
We are so worried about things that will never really come to fruition. It only really become a reality because we breathe life into it.
No one really cares – they are absorbed in their own lives. And full disclose – with all the content floating around, the chance they stumble across yours is pretty unlikely.
Caring is meant for relationship building – not as a road block
Let’s call a spade a spade – you saying that you care what people say or think is not you being all seeing and perceptive. It’s you being afraid and using “caring” as a roadblock (eh, crutch).
After all, it’s easier to say you would NEVER than actually trying something and figuring out its not for you. WRONG.
That’s so unfulfilling and yet so human.
We would rather “play it safe” than potentially face failure. Saying that “I care what people think” is really just saying “I don’t want to fail” in disguise.
It’s an old and tired costume. Quite frankly it’s boring.
I care about you vs I care what you think about me – there’s a subtly and every time I’ve seen toxic relationships it stems from the difference between these two mentalities.
Let’s wrap this up
We need to stop just going through the motions and limiting ourself with a screwed up mentality that clogs our potential and degrades our productivity. Speak from a place of experience rather than from a place of regret and misconception of being perceived as “foolish”
I would rather be foolish than unfulfilled and you can quote me on that.